OK, This Might Get A Little Gross

A blog that talks about what a mom has learned as a mom wouldn’t be complete without a post about stomach flu.

It would be nice if I could share practical ways to avoid catching this dreaded (SUPER-dreaded) sickness, or ways to clean up the messes, and freshen the air….

….but I am feeling more on the sarcastic-tired-of-sleeping-in-between-bucket-dumps-type.  I apologize in advance.

• KIDS ALWAYS WAIT UNTIL THE LAST, POSSIBLE MOMENT TO THROW UP
• THEY RARELY MAKE IT TO AN “EASY-TO-CLEAN-UP” PLACE
• WHAT THEY PUKED IS USUALLY THE SAME AS YOUR LAST MEAL
• ODO BAN CLEANER SMELLS JUST AS BAD AS THE MESS YOU JUST CLEANED.
• EVEN IF YOU AREN’T SICK IN THE *MICROBIOLOGICAL SENSE*….YOU FEEL JUST AS SICK
• HEALTHY, OLDER KIDS ARE not HELPFUL, IN FACT, THEY BECOME INVISIBLE.

That pretty much sums up my last 48 hours.  But is wasn’t my first lesson in Vomit 101…more like 2101.

Have a nice day. 😀  Blahhhh!

What a Mom Can Count On

• THERE ARE DAILY THINGS THAT MOMS CAN RELY ON

Like Legos underfoot, socks left damp and smelly in the toe of any boot, empty cookie jars, sticky doorknobs, empty toilet paper rolls, spills during the meal, phone calls that wake babies, dogs that run out every time a child opens the door, sickness when planning a day out, and seldom getting a full night of uninterrupted sleep.

• THESE THINGS CAN GET REALLY ANNOYING!

To have at least 18 years of these same things over and over playing out nearly every day, a woman can reach her limit of patience!

• ONE DAY A MOM WILL REALIZE SHE MISSES THOSE SAME, ANNOYING, DAILY, RELIABLE THINGS.

She will turn around in her empty nest one day and find that she misses baking for her crew, meals are dull and boring, there is no one to run the dog, and it is too quiet to sleep.  She wishes she was still needed.  The doorknobs and laundry stay clean longer.  The bathroom stays stocked longer. And her phone is quiet.  She would love the chance to rock a baby to sleep.

We are blessed dear friends with these houses full of children and different “annoying” things that fill our days.  And one day we will be blessed to welcome grandchildren to fill our homes with the noise and clutter that accompanies these young families.

Let’s not wish away today, tomorrow comes soon enough.

Drowsy Mom

• YOUR NEED FOR A NAP IS DIRECTLY PROPORTIONATE TO THE CHILDREN’S NEED FOR THEIR MOTHER

Today was a nice, sunny Sunday, perfect for extended family to stop in for some leftover birthday dessert. However, whenever company leaves it seems I get a massive nap-attack. Nothing can keep my eyes open. Nothing.
So I hear myself drowsily bargaining with anyone older than 10 to please keep an eye on the youngest 4 so I can catch a 15 or 20 minute couch nap. (I could already picture my head bobbing during the evening sermon)
So the arrangements are made…and I start to get that delicious, stupid feeling as I punch some life into a couple of throw pillows and lie down on the couch. Aaaaa
“Mom, can we get out the play-doh?”
“We wanna go roller blade at the park.”
“Can we get out the granola bars?”
How many kids do I have, anyway???
Tick tock…..ugh, 5 precious minutes wasted.
Quick, shut your eyes and don’t think about the time.
Ding-a-ling-a-ling!! (that is a phone for you that are too young to remember what they used to sound like)
I read the name on the cellphone…OK, I need to hear from her, so I answer.

• BEING ON THE PHONE PRODUCES CHILDHOOD CRISIS.

I lost count of how many interruptions that 30 minute call got. I do know that I nearly broke my arm trying to wave them out of the room, though.
What I don’t understand is this…if I was so drowsy at 4 pm…what am I still doing up at 11 pm???

“Please, Mommy, put me to bed earlier!”

Okay, Moms…ever had a child that wakes up all wrong and spends the entire day doing exactly what he knows to be wrong???  Then, no matter what the consequence, or how many privileges he misses out on, he begins the next day the same way!!!

I usually tuck them sweetly into bed (cherishing the soon-coming-quiet) and encourage him that tomorrow is a new day and he can start fresh and do better.  The “new start” incentive doesn’t seem to touch young boys…

So here is what I have learned (and re-learned):

• THE CHILD STUCK IN THE NAUGHTY MODE IS BEGGING FOR MORE SLEEP!

After three consecutive days of ‘naughty’…and the trend spreading to the next younger child…I made the executive decision to put those two boys to bed 1.5 hours early.

Now I was prepared for a lot of whining and a bunch of repeated tuck-ins.

But they both were sleeping almost immediately!

Why am I surprised?